Do you want something done, ask the busy person

Why is that?

Why is it that if you look like a doer, a person to get the job done, suddenly more people want you to do things for them?

Having a bit of a down day here, just tired from trying to cram too much into the days of my life.

Found myself on the EB committee and now seem to be the delegate secretary of the same. Doing the karate stuff love that, but it too comes with lots of organisation, especially around grading time.

Then there is the parent I have to ring that has just had a child diagnosed with a hearing loss - boy do I feel guilty I haven't called her yet.

Work, home life, kids, homework - no wonder I am tired.

So there was only one thing for it - PIZZA for dinner tonight, no cooking, no cleaning, just sitting about on my butt which may get larger if I do this too often - who knows might even head for a glass of red in a minute.......

Finding your dream

Well super exciting week for our family this week. Last weekend saw our nephew make his way onto the hallowed turf of Hindmarsh Stadium as part of the Baby Red's - Adelaide United's Youth Team!! Check out the link on this page to find out more about the Baby Red's and our favourite "Baby Red"!

Oh we were so much the excited Uncle, Auntie and cousins - so much so that when the 2 senior players dropped from the A side took to the pitch at the outset, it all took all our self control not to jump the fence and give them what for!! But alas part of the new youth league is that up to 3 senior players can play down in the youth league while regaining form or recovering from injury : -(





This poor guy was probably only in his early 20's but to us he was an "old dude" taking up the space our nephew should have been in! In true mature responsible adult fashion we all had a great time coming up with comments shared just between us of course not for general consumption.





BUT the rules also say that each youth player must play for 30 minutes, so with 30 to go, the announcer spoke those magic words "Substitution of Adelaide United, coming off is (blank) and coming on his place is Michael Doyle" - at which point I could do nothing but yell and scream like banshee from the top row of the stands right under the scoreboard!!! My poor kids were looking for the concrete stand to split wide open and swallow them whole but hey they are used to me by now!





Michael has had a soccer ball at his feet almost every waking hour from the time he could walk. His Dad played and coached soccer and so has always been very happy spending time with Michael and a soccer ball from a very tender age.





We have all watched him progress through the various competitions, almost always playing well above his age level because of his abilities.





Every time he went to Hindmarsh to watch a game he dreamt of the day that maybe he would be on that pitch as a player, not just a spectator in the stands.





Last Saturday he did just that and realised his dream!





This is only the beginning for this talented young man and we are so proud of him! So happy too that all the years of sacrifices, of hours spent working on physical fitness, ball skills and still spending enough time on his studies to complete year 12 and start on a TAFE course as well, he has finally taken that big step to be part of the Adelaide United family.





He is also just a really lovely young man and untainted by his successes, we watch eagerly on to see what the next chapter of finding his dream will hold.

It's all about me, me, me

OK been awhile, but I have gone a little blog crazy today....

Yesterday our 24,000 litre rain water tank arrived, to be connected up next week - very exciting!

This will be added to the 3 existing 1400 litre tanks we have. When we are finished they will all be hooked up to the big'un and a pump will ensure that the rain water is pumped into the house for us to use.

Since we don't use that much water on watering our garden, we aim to get 6-8 months a year running on rain water.

What really bugs me is when you mention to people you are going to set up to use rain water you get..."why? It isn't like water costs that much? You still have to pay service fees and stuff."

Yep you do and yep water doesn't cost much right now, but I'm not sure it will stay that way.

Besides this isn't so much about the money we might save but more about trying to use the rainwater and take less out of our dying Murray water system. Don't get me wrong we are not labouring under any illusions that the small bit of water we use will suddenly resurrect the Murray if we are not taking it. We also recognise how much water industry and farming use and that individual home owners usage is really a drop in the ocean.

BUT every little bit has to help, and even if it doesn't amount for much in real terms right now, perhaps the message it sends to our kids about trying to be mindful of ways that we can better use our resources, will have a bigger impact in the future.

If all of our kids were learning the lessons of renewable energy resources, electricity audits on home power use, how to collect and save water for the times when it isn't so abundant, then just maybe we might make some bigger steps in the future than we are doing right now. The apathetic amongst us certainly are not leading the charge for future action now, are they?

Next stop solar panels!

Sexting

Ok so now "sexting" has become a possible means by which teens can be bullied or harrassed?

According to recent media reports, teens are sending sms messages with sexually explicit content, or even photos of themselves, to boyfriends who, when the relationship fails, choose to send them to the girl's friends, family or other males at the school.

Or apparently some boys get a mate "to secret themselves away" in a hidden place so they can film sexual activity between the other boy and his girlfriend and then they can do what they like with these videos.

What the hell is going on????

I mean sure teens have always used various means by which to flirt with one another and yep when relationships go pear-shaped people don't always shower themselves in glory with the way they behave.

But really, what is going on here? Why is that these smart techno teens of today don't see how easy it is for their trust to breached and abused and the far ranging implications for them if someone does breach their trust? What are they thinking sms-ing compromising images of themselves to their boyfriend? As for text messages of an explicit nature, have we learned nothing from the lessons Shane Warne has tried to share with us? I mean it wasn't like we had to get it the first time, he did afterall give us more than opportunity to heed and understand the message!!

It is all kind of sad really. It seems that is just getting harder and harder for our kids, especially our girls, to be just that KIDS. All too soon they are feeling peer pressure to wear make up, to dress like a "mini-adult" or sometimes, lets be honest, like mini-hookers in some cases. The children's underwear department host's bra tops and matching knickers and allegedly according to some mums, even g-string underwear??? Are you serious? Why are we raising kids who at that tender age are even going to care if the top matches or the undies, or even that they need to wear a "bra top" when they have a chest to rival a pancake??

As a girl at that age, maybe it was just me or even my generation, what a bunch of totally unsophisticated, naieve munchikins we were. I can remember in year 7 getting into trouble at school because we trying to do those "up their cazaly" football marks on the backs of the guys we hung with - not sure why we got into trouble whether it was because we were unladylike (shocking I know!!) or because we may have injured the guys or ourselves on their watch! And for those really really out there times there was the age old kiss chasey - where you had to run like the wind when the guy you didn't like was after you, or trip and fall with the style of many a leading actress in the typical horror flick, when the guy you really fancied was chasing you!

Maybe the boys were being raised in an environment of more respect for girls as seen at home and maybe as a result of the kinds of music videos now plastered everywhere on a weekend morning, not being available to them back then. Maybe we girls were the product of raging female lib parents??

Although my Mum was certainly not like that. My Dad was a pretty strong personality though. But I always remember having a strong sense of self respect. Not that I didn't suffer the usual teen angst of self consciousness and feeling like everyone in the room was looking and judging me when I walked in, when in actual fact, was the reality was they probably didn't even notice me!! However I do remember having a strong view of me and what was acceptable and what was not.

I can remember a camp in primary school, must have been year 7 I think. We had a kind of young dude teacher we all thought was pretty cool...but he elevated his status big time when he brought his younger brother to the camp to help out. He must have been a uni student or some such I think but he had almost shoulder length hair and played the guitar. Oh you can picture it now, can't you? Like a scene out of grease, these 12-13 year old girls sitting around the camp fire postively glowing "in love" with the teacher's hot younger brother as he sat playing guitar. I recall him playing "living next door to Alice"...big mistake on his part - that became the camp theme song - for the girls at least. The cue to sit and drool while trying to sing and feast our eyes on this addonis before us! Kind of funny now looking back on it!

In high school we had the group of friends where invariably you tend to all being going out with one of the group. There was a guy in this group who as year older than me....we were going out together when I was about 15 I reckon...for all of like 6 weeks! Yeah long term relationships back then...however long term enough for him to decide to broach the conversation of the prospect of indulging in some horizontal dancing!!

Well poor bastard, don't think he had any idea of just what a wrong idea that was when he was dealing with me - by the time my tirade had finished I reckon his ears would have been ringing for days! It started with "Excuse me, just what kind of girl do you think I am?" and rolled on from there like the proverbial train derailment with accompanying wreckage along the way!

Granted one of my friend at around the time claims to have "done it" in the back of a horse float with one of her the guys from her horse riding club - but well you never know do you really? Sure she had the hickeys but hickeys are a long way from "doin' it"

The thought of taking photos of ourselves and giving them to these guys - not even in the same library let alone the same page of our thinking back then!

Hubby works in an environment where he sees too often girls who have such a low self esteem and their self respect is so lacking that in essence they are letting these boys do what they want to them in order to feel valued or accepted. The conversations hubby has had the misfortune of overhearing, can only be described as tragically sad and soul destroying.

I know that it is an issue of self esteem but it pulls at my heart that these girls feel it is ok for boys to treat them this way. That somehow this will gain them acceptance! I want to shout at them "you are better than this, you deserve better than this, this is not ok!"

"You do not have to do things you are not comfortable with or behave in ways that are self-degrading just to fit in"

"You are beautiful just the way you are, if this moron can't see that, he doesn't deserve you, kick him in the cods and go find someone who is worthy of you"

Sadly that doesn't happen and these girls find themselves on a slippery slope that often has far reaching implications in the longer term.

So fellow parents - we have a war to win.

Parents of daughters - build their self-esteem and their self respect. Have them honour who they are and their right to be treated correctly. Have them understand the loser that bags them for not wanting to sleep with them or do this or that "for them" is a loser with a "L" and they should run as fast as humanly possible away from people like this - these losers are not worthy of them! Have them also value and acknowledge those boys that do treat them with the respect they deserve.

Parents of boys - build their self esteem and self respect too. BUT teach them that they must respect the female of the species in the same way in which they respect themselves. That they should think of how people treat their mother when they think of the females in their lives. Would they like people to treat their mother in a way that was disrespectful? No, and so they should treat the ladies in their lives in the same way in which they like to see their mothers treated.

Master 16 surprised last year when relaying the story of a girl who he is good friends with that asked him if he liked her more than a friend. He replied he did, he liked her as a "very good, one of his best friends" friend but he didn't like her in a girlfriend kind of way.With all those raging hormones, it was good to see he valued her friendship and her as a person enough to be completely honest with her! Ok so maybe it might have something to do with the fact his mother is a black belt and would seriously kick his arse if she found out he was treating a girl with anything but his utmost respect!

The Rarity of Normality

So according to recent reports, todays internet technology is repsonsible for an increase in violence in our younger folk, places like facebook and myspace and everything in between apparently.

Add to that the regularly touted statistics that only about 2 kids in a class of 28 regularly sit down to an evening meal with their family - and well it all paints a pretty depressing picture.

Perhaps it is the social breakdown of the family unit, of community spirit and caring for the welfare and well being of others in our community that actually serves to generate the problems we are seeing today, perhaps this is more the culprit than facebook or myspace or even youtube!

All of this, and a recent birthday of Master 16, had me contemplating just how lucky we are, here in our household - I don't know if we are the rarity of normality (as it was when we kids grew up) or perhaps we are the exception to a sadder more modern normality.

Master 16 had the typical teen birthday that went for about a week - that is when you know you are still a kid and not an adult - when you are an adult you are lucky to get your birthday to last for 24 hours .....

So Master 16 celebrated on the day with a dinner for just the 4 of us at Gringo's Mexican at the Bay - oh and it was good! We are all a bit partial to guacamole, nachos and tortillas. So there we sat, inhaling this beautiful food until we reached our fill.....well we thought we had until we found Copenhagen icecream around the corner calling us to come in and have a little icecream for dessert that is!

Then came the weekend where we spent an afternoon with my mother and step-father, and my brother and nephew. Yup another one of those family type gatherings, the kids disppear upstairs to play their games and the adults can sit and eat all that "crap party food" and chat; catching up on what is happening in each others lives.

One of Master 16's favourite comments around here is, with his voice dripping sarcasm, he says "and how mature are you?" Granted it normally comes after a well earned juvenile display from me...like when we are getting settled to watch a movie nonchalantly walking into the room clearly not bothered on which chair I sit, then at the last minute dashing head long for the desired seat, pushing children's bodies behind me! Or his most damning of my juvenile behaviours, cracking up laughing at my own jokes before anyone else does "That is just disturbed, Mum. You don't laugh at your own jokes before someone else does it is just wrong".

So on the weekend he decided to seek counsel from his uncle and get him to agree with him that in fact I was disturbed because I laugh at my own jokes first. My brother's rsesponse (man I love this guy!!) went like this....

"Well you see some of us have a more highly evolved sense of humour than others. Then when we crack a joke, we need to laugh at it, to indicate that a joke has been made, so those not as highly evolved can know that it means they may have to think a little harder to find the joke in what we said"....cracking me up, I just looked at Master 16 and said "yeah, what he said" pointing at my brother - needless to say Master 16 just rolled his eyes in true teen fashion.

Then last night was the finale of the every going birthday celebration. We were invaded by six 16 year olds, 2 girls and 4 boys. I had met 3 of them before last night. I often refer to Master 16 and his friends as the misfits and I mean that in a loving, caring motherly way. I mean it in they don't fit the mold of "teenage jocks" or "supersporty" and each of them has their own sense of quirkiness but as a unit they just fit and work so well together. They are all incredibly supportive of each other and have a great friendship between them all.

So it was destination cold hills area of town on the day that was the coldest in 3 years! yep those poor parents would have loved us coming out for a 5.30pm drop off and a 10.30pm pick up.

The first thing that struck me was the giving of "gifts". As is usual fare at this age, it is often a card with some money and maybe a block of chocolate to boot. The thing that really touched me was that the majority of the cards were made by the kids themselves, and yes the boys being creative - who would have thought??? Mind you being creative allows for the subtle double play meanings you can put in your mate's cards that you might not find in your newsagent stand! These kids had spent their own time making cards for their mate for his birthday - I was stoked! How awesome that they wanted to spend the time, and equally how awesome that they didn't feel the need to buy a card so that they fitted some notion of the modern hip crowd with just the right card - see what I mean, misfits in the best possible ways.

When Master 16 planned his birthday, he had the option to choose more or less whatever he wanted, taking a group to the movies or somewhere else. "Nope mum, we don't need to do that stuff. We have the wii, the table tennis table, DVDs. We can do all that and all just sit about and talk and eat the party stuff" And that pretty much summed up the time they had last night. More soft drink was consumed per head than I thought humanly possible - lucky they left here late, hopefully they were tired when they got home and not buzzing on all that sugar!

It was bitterly cold last night but they cared not a jot! Outside for table tennis they went til hypothermia set in and they couldn't feel their fingers and thus had difficulty wielding their paddle with ease.

Of course they were not perfect angels all the time - they are teenagers, I would be worried if they were perfect angels all the time. The allure of the spiral staircase had been fought for sometime before they succumbed. Piling on top of each other and trying to slide down the bannister. Hubby was not impressed with this behaviour and read the riot act. I had to keep quiet because at their age, running full to the brim on sugar and hormones, I'm pretty certain I would have done the same thing - afterall bannisters are for sliding down really! Especially if you are in someone else's home and you don't have one of your own!

At different points in the night we had coffee with the parents of Master 16's best friend. Mum dropped them off, Dad did pick up. Poor Dad he turned up at 10 instead of 10.30 to wails of protest as he was picking up about 4 people! So he had to have a coffee to pass that crucial extra 30 mins at the end of a 5 hour period.

During our conversations we touched on the good things and perhaps the slightly scary things to come. We touched on how whilst it is a pain to have to go and drop them off and pick them up on a cold, wet night - it is a blessing knowing exactly where they are and who they are with and that they have a safe lift home. They are all coming to the age where they can get their "learners permits" and eventually be able to drive themselves. Fortunately this group are not the least bit interested yet and we, their parents, are happy to let this one lay dormant for as long as possible.

We also talked about how many 16 year olds try to smuggle alcohol in to each others' parties. As for these guys there was no smuggling and the contraband on the night consisted of extra wii controllers, some wii games and a PC game or two.

Of course we know we have to let them grow up and take their own paths but for now, things are in a really nice place. All of us as parents in this group know where they are, we drop them at each others' houses for movie nights, or poker nights or warhammer game days. We also know that the parents of all these kids have done a great job raising great kids who are respectful and sensible and just enjoy hanging out together without the need to do totally random stupid things.

So for now, as a group, we feel really blessed that our kids have found each other and have found a really great friendship group and that we as parents can feel comfortable in slowly letting them find their feet and start to explore more of life on their own terms.

Wow, wow and more wow

What an amazing and inspirational weekend this has been. Ok sure, the fact it was jammed pack full of karate might have been part of the reason!

However it was having a weekend seminar led by Rod Martin (and his father Graham for one day) that was the cause of all this excitement and inspiration.

So whilst never one to think I was anything that great in this karate caper, I guess after doing it for awhile, you have a notion of what you know, right? Well kind of...what you don't know, is how damn much you don't know! Well after this weekend, we could park this universe and the next into the space that fills what I don't know!

BUT this is not a woe is me, life is horrible I'm going to go eat worms kind of what I don't know kind of post...oh no no no!

This is a how awesome, how amazing that there is so much that I don't know, yet now have an opportunity to learn. Perhaps even more amazing - the realisation that I will never stop learning, there will always be things to learn, to contemplate, to delve further into in order to gain a better understanding.

Being the not so nice side of 40, it has been in my mind that perhaps at some point, it will be time to call it a day because I'm not going to be able to do a head high mawashi geri for ever.

And you know that doesn't matter! It is so clear to me that there are several lifetimes of learning there just waiting for the taking. These men in their 70's still training, still living karate, still brilliant practitioners of their art, and passing their skills and knowlege onto others - how can you not be attracted to that? To be able to keep learning right on through to your later years.

Case in point Leo Lipinski born in 1946, and Shuji Tasaki in 1931 both of whom are still practising and still managing to frighten the beejeepers out of their students with their power and skill!

Leo Lipinski (Left picture) Shuji Tasaki (Right Picture)

Now this weekend has not been without its "interesting moments" - like in the first 10 minutes when I nearly did the "big girl"thing and burst into tears! Oh yeah big tough karate-ka reduced to big girl in near record time! It wasn't the notion of not doing it right, nor was it the notion of being

corrected that nearly caused the big bottom lip drop! It was the sheer blind frustration of seeing it, processing it in my brain and then have my body feel like it belonged to someone else's brain stem because it sure wasn't doing what the signal from mine was telling it to do! Seriously glad the tears didn't flow because then I would have been seriously cranky pants at myself for the big girl routine.

It's a funny thing that often times as adults we dwell in the comfort zone of the known and we learn bits and pieces here and there, yet to put yourself out there as a complete beginner is sure heading into scary territory. Add to that putting yourself out there standing side by side with students you teach, that my friend is humbling on a big scale...yet equally how empowering for all of those lower belts and kids to see us as their instructors struggling with new concepts and being corrected on our mistakes right their alongside them and blending in as complete unco's.

Perhaps it is all the karate talk of the weekend or the fact that much of our talk also touched on the more spiritual side of what we do, but it was sure a weekend of contemplation. In terms of actual physical techniques/applications, there were many ahhh-haaaa light bulb moments when concepts or ideas just clicked or became clearer than they had ever been.

On a more philosophical level, there were as many lightbulb moments. Like that we might regret that our opportunity to partake in this didn't come along sooner - yet as Rod suggested, things often come along at the right time, the time that you are ready for them. It is highly likely without having trod the path of the last 3 years, I would not be as engaged and motivated and keen to take this stuff on as I am now.

It got me thinking on a different level about our westernised system of coloured belts and levels and kata. Do we get too caught up in what belt we are, when we might next grade and lose sight of the learning, the growing, the fact that we will continually be learning, or should I say, we should be continually learning!

I think I read somewhere that historically in Japan, there were no colour belts, you were a white belt until such time as your sensei decided you were now ready and had developed within yourself on the journey to be a black belt, and that the black belt was representative of your white belt that had become so dirty during all those years of training it was in fact almost black.

So after the most amazing weekend in which we gained just a snap shot of what is possible, of how much there is to learn - I now have a new outlook on my karate - to now being that of the eternal beginner!

Thanks to Rod, Graham and Hoshindo for a brilliant weekend and the beginning of a beautiful friendship : - )

Common Sense

When my father retired in his latter years, I recall having a conversation with him about common sense. He said that he had thought the common sense was everywhere but since his retirement had instead found it to be as rare as hen's teeth...he was astounded at the total lack of common sense displayed by the general population.

Like the person who asked me a few weeks ago if breaking a board with a punch hurt? Well what do you reckon, if you hit a solid object with your hand of course there is going to be some discomfort Einstein, I mean really, did you expect me to say it didn't??? Sure it doesn't last long but yes you can feel when you have hit it!!!



Or the morons that think the merge lane is in fact a ticket to plant your foot in order to beat the other guy into the lane...oh the fact there is a round about less than 50m ahead of you and you have to jump on the breaks to avoid rear ending the person in front of you, clearly not something to be considered let alone worried about.



Or that person at work that asks that you do something for them which you dutifully do, only to have them return to collect the work looking totally confused. A few questions from you and it becomes painfully obvious they have not even read what they gave you to do first. It would seem kind of obvious that you read it first to make sure it is what you want before giving it to someone else to do??? I mean really what is with people today?



Is it the "its all about me" part of this generation that they have no clue about how their behaviour might impact on other people?



Like the shopping centre carpark yesterday. One shopper wanted to reverse out of a carpark, but the person behind had stopped too close - did they reverse up to assist the person getting out of the park? Nope, nada, bugger them, let them do it the hard way, I ain't moving Jack. So this person undertakes the equivalent of the 52 point turn in reverse to get out of this park. At the same time traffic is building to the equivalent of the Harbour Bridge with one lane closed for repair during peak hour. This person cares not a jot. Afterall "I'm alright Jack, don't really give a toss if anyone else is alright"



I just don't get the headspace between these people's ears. Nine times out of ten, their behaviour ultimately does impact on them but are they just too dumb to get it? It isn't about being the equivalent of a graduate from ladettes to ladies here people, it isn't rocket science! It is afterall in essence a bit of courtesy and consideration of others and most of all common sense. Before you open your mouth, or do something that actually demonstrates your capacity to be a moron, pause and just think it through. Is this the best way I can do this, or will it cause problems for others and can I achieve the same thing without causing a full scale disaster in my small corner or the world?



Perhaps if more people adhered to this simple principle the rest of us would not spend so many of our waking hours resisting the urge to slap people like this sideways everytime they demonstrate to us just how lacking on common sense they are!

Memories

It has been a kind of funny time of late - much time spent in the company of my own gorgeous teenagers, chasing each other around the table tennis table and dodging a well timed thwack of the table tennis bat paddled in the direction of your rear end!

We often mourn those that we have lost and those feelings of loss are so strong in the early days and over time, the loss doesn't go away but the way we respond to it changes. Maybe because we let our minds wander to those that we have lost, we open the door again to the memories of life with them.

A good friend of mine recently lost his father, so I guess it was kind of inevitable my thoughts would turn to my own father. Interestingly there have been conversations with another friend about an upcoming event in her life which again directed my thoughts back to my father.

My mum reckons I remind her of him at times with my mannerisms. My brother on the other hand is the living image of my father, right down to the way in which he answers the telephone!

Dad grew up in fairly tough times with his father having to work on the railways to make a living, leaving his mother largely to raise the family on her own during those times his father was away. As the oldest son, I think in many ways he took on much of the responsibility for his mother and his younger siblings.

I'm sure it was his upbringing that made him the way he was, he was a pretty forthright guy...one of the things I remember most as an adult was him saying "If you want to hear me say what you want to hear, then don't ask me, because if you ask me what I think I am going to tell you what I think whether you like it or not!" Well like he said, we were warned! Many a time family members asked him his opinion, with no concept that what would come out was the honest truth as he saw it, no softly softly, no bullshit, just his thoughts laid out there on the table.

He did his stint in national service as a young man, and well all that routine and rigidity of life must have sure suited him because it sure became a way of life in our household. It wasn't a dull, scary, nasty place, quite the opposite but there was a routine and heaven help he who didn't follow the routine.

Of course as the youngest and the only daughter, I was always Daddy's Princess and he sooo loved having a daughter as father's often do. Sadly for him, his wasn't the prissy feminine thing seen sitting delicately on the seat in a sea of pink tulle and lace...nope his daughter was the jeans and T-shirt girl, tearing around the yard like a mad thing, trying to keep up with my older brother and his friends...none of that girlie stuff for this girl - what a bore!

As was the case for many fathers of his generation he was a master of the school of tough love. Not that we were really smacked that often that I can remember, although I do remember one or two summers as an up myself tween that I shot my mouth off, only to reel from the sting of a well timed thwack with the rubber thong deftly whipped off his foot and aimed across the back of my leg. Still I can honestly say I never had to wonder what it was I was being punished for, each time I wore one, I had been being a total smart mouthed pain in the arse and the pain finished up being mine just for a shortwhile til the sting went : - )

He had some classic sayings that to this day I chuckle when I think about them. Like when as kids we would hang off him with this constant whinging tirade of "Oh I wish we could have a ......." which we would then just repeat over and over again in an instinctive child knowledge of Japanese water torture (although we didn't know that is what it was at the time). He would put up with the whinging and whining for as long as he could and then smile sweetly at us and respond with "Wellll why don't you try wishing in one hand and spitting in the other and see which gets full first" LOL can you believe he used to say that to us kids?

Or the more stereotypic parental sayings like "If B wanted to jump off a cliff, would you want to do that too?" and perhaps most frightening of that little gem is the moment I first heard it come from my own mouth in discussion with my own children...arrrggghhhhh I'm turning into my own parents!!!!!

I don't actually recall this one happening but knowing what a total bitch I was as a tween, I have no doubt about its truth. One Saturday morning having collected me from gymnastics, Dad wanted to stop off at the shop to pick up a few things and get us some tasties for lunch from the bakery. Well of course I didn't go into the shops with him, are you kidding??? How embarrassing being seen in the company of your olds at the shop! Nope, not I!!! Having returned to the car to deposit the shopping, he enquired sweetly through my passenger side window as to what I might like (for lunch). It would appear that at some point in the morning he had managed to rearrange his pants and socks in such a way as to have his trouser leg tucked into his sock! So in response to his loving question about the possible cullinary delights I might like, the poor bugger got a mouthful....allegedly that went something like this "What I'd like is for you to take your pants of our your sock and stop looking like a dickhead!" What a complete and utter bitch, but you know as a tween there is nothing more sacred than not appearing like a total tool in front of your peers and well, what if someone had seen him dressed like that and recognised him as my father? Lordy, lordy I'd have to have hibernated for months to avoid the embarrassment of that one! I have no idea how I managed to escape his wrath for that little outburst, perhaps he too remembered those teen angst years and cut me some slack...as I now do for son number 2 when I speed up if I see anyone he knows in the distance so by the time they walk by us, I am several metres in front and number 2 son is clearly not "out with the olds".

Mind you my Dad wasn't always serious, far from it! He had a prized gi-normous wooden spoon hanging on the wall that said "World's Greatest Stirrer" given him to by work colleagues because he was most assuredly a shit stirrer with a very cutting, very witty sense of humour - see you can see that my father and I are nothing alike really...not!!

I remember my Dad giving son number 1 a big box wrapped up as a gift for his birthday. Beloved son had asked for a soccer ball and so expected to find that when he unwrapped his gift - you can imagine his surprise when he opened the box and it contained a roll of toilet paper! Of course my Dad thought he was just hilarious. So that became the standing gift between son and grandfather for several years, a version of the wrapped up roll of toilet paper given for birthdays or Christmas!

Sadly for my kids along with some of his parenting sayings I too have a decidedly immature sense of humour - yep there have been times when they have asked me one time too many what is for tea and I can't help myself but the words "pooh on toast" roll off my tongue with consumate ease!

I'm not sure why it is but karate and my Dad seemed to have been an intertwining story in my life. I signed up my oldest son and myself for karate mid week when one of those door to door folk appeared offering a package if 2 people signed up together. I spoke to my father a day or so later and told him I was planning on doing karate with my oldest - what could he say really? All those years of raising a tomboy, I'm not sure anything surprised him. Whilst he had been ill for sometime and we knew his time was limited, the suddeness of his death took us all by surprise, it was the early hours of a Wednesday morning. It was the Sunday of that week that son and mother were to partake of their first karate lesson. In an attempt to both keep a sense of normality to their lives and to not disappoint my son, off we went to that karate lesson. What a complete godsend that was! All the angst, turmoil and sadness left me for the duration of my time in the dojo. There was so much to learn, so much to absorb, all my energy and focus were directed at what was going on in front of me. I thought I was doing a pretty good job, til the clown in front said "now we will move forwards and backwards doing that"...hahaha pretty funny joke eh? Only he wasn't joking! I wonder whether it was that beautiful sense of calm, of invigoration of my spirit that I experienced that day, that has melded me to the practice of karate from that day forth.

Many years later, my brown belt grading was approaching, the biggie, the biggest one apart from the black belt shodan grading, so everyone said. I was the picture of calm and tranquility at that grading (most unusual for the nerve bucket I usually am pre-grading). However for this grading I was completely calm because I believed no matter what happened I was going to grade that day. Why? Because it was meant to be. The date of my brown belt grading fell on my father's birthdate.

This week precedes another big grading, in many ways the biggest yet. Where the shodan was the undergrad, the nidan becomes the post grad. The journey as much about me and what I have learnt and how I use what I know to help out others, as it is about learning specific moves or stances. And yet I still I find myself thinking of him and writing a blog to honour him - again the alignment is there in my life, that link that continues.

Memories are so good to have of those we love and when it comes to lost parents, I think we don't really appreciate them or who they really are until we become adults in the first instance and then more tellingly as parents ourselves in the second instance. We sure forgive our parents a multitude of "sins" when we take to the daunting task of parenting ourselves. We discover only too soon that kids don't come with instruction manuals and you just have to make the best decision you can at the time, sometimes it is the right one, sometimes it is the wrong one....but the decision was always made with love and with the best intentions!

The Simple Things

Well I am truly a gal of simple pleasures these days....

I don't know if it is a getting older kind of thing, maybe getting wiser...my kids might contest that point....maybe it is just getting more comfortable in your own shoes so you just worry less about the unimportant things.

It is of course school holidays - a living nightmare for some parents!

I have always been pretty lucky, when the boys were younger, their Dad being a teacher got to be home with them all the time! I didn't go back to more than 15 hours a week work til they were school age so we were home together a lot of the time. As they grew older I was back full time and still only had 4 weeks of leave to share with them each year.

Over the last 5 or so years, having become part of the school based employee club, I now get school holidays too!!! Oh how quickly I adapted to all that extra time off I can tell you.

It has been such a great thing. I am now mum's taxi to two teenage boys to and from school every day. Of course we get there earlier than their mates and leave after them too, but it gives extra time for homework or getting access to the classroom first thing in the morning to get that book you forgot but need in order to do your homework : - )

What it has brought is a lot of time to just hang with my boys. In this totally crazy world where life flies by and you wonder where the years have gone, this time to just hang is the most precious thing of all. Time spent in the car could be conversations of events of the day, or it could be silence as I drive, one sits and thinks to himself, the other attempts to blow his eardrums to pieces with Metallica blaring through the ear pieces of his mp4 player. One of our most favourite things to do on the drive home is to tune into Hamish and Andy. Fortunately (or perhaps unfortunately) the boys and I share the same sense of humour. Many a time we have driven home from school in stitches of laughter, and just when we manage to compose ourselves Hamish starts laughing and his infectious laugh starts us all off again! Or the days when a voice from behind me says "Mum can you just take a breath, and stop laughing. You are the driver, you need to focus on the road!" We have tried to share our stories with hubby and father when we arrive home, to no avail, it seems it is one of those "had to be there" kind of things.

I now know who their closest friends are, who the kids that drive them nuts because they act like morons are, which girls are part of the "in crowd" and which girls are just blah! Like I said time spent with them is so precious.

We have really been truly blessed by 2 gorgeous boys, well they will always be boys to me, but at almost 16 and 14, they are in fact on the verge of being young men. The 15 months between them (no of course it wasn't planned that way!!!!) has been brilliant because they get on so well together. Very rarely they have a spat but it is usually because one or the other is over tired or stressed and worried about something. As a general rule they are tight as, they hang out together and actually genuinely enjoy each others company. Yet for all their compatibility, they are in fact very different personalities. One is the confident, assertive, outgoing academic, loves school, loves learning, loves writing pages and pages...the other is much less confident, very hands on, loves the technical and the doing, loathes the writing, loves music and is quite a gifted guitar player.

So this weekend has been time spent with my most gorgeous boys. My guitarist has taken to downloading music off the net and teaching himself things to play. I love that he is so passionate about things and so keen to teach himself new things. When he plays and practices, I praise him on the good job that he is doing, whilst silently despairing that if I hear that same Metallica song played again and again for another hour I may well garrotte myself on the closest spare string I can find!

Then out of the blue yesterday Master 16 decided it was time to reclaim the table tennis table. It has for some months now been wearing a fetching green artificial lawn carpet which was of course home to the battlezone for Warhammer - a strategy game involving self assembled models, which is very popular with teen boys.

Thus we had the task of remembering just where were put the bats, the balls and the nets - which we found with surprising ease - hey gotta be lucky sometimes right.

The boys spent some time hanging out playing against each other, and all we could hear from inside was friendly sledging and copious amounts of laughter. When they asked us to come out to play, I realised that their friendly playing was in fact, time spent getting their eye in and rhythm back so that they might whip the asses of their parents! For awhile it worked too.

So last night, a swinging Saturday night in our household, was spent outside on the patio playing table tennis, just the 4 of us. It was just the best thing! We didn't talk about the problems of the world or how to solve them. We didn't grill the boys about where they had been or what they were doing or if they were taking drugs? No, we were just simply being together, enjoying each others company, sharing the fun and laughter of a family game of table tennis.

Yep the simplest things in life are truly the best.....

Exercise

Well exercise is a funny thing really isn't it? I must say I have always had a bit of a love/hate relationship with it really.

As kids we had the "you have to do one sport" rule in our house so couch surfing the weekends away wasn't ever going to be an option really.

My primary school and most of my high school years were dominated with two sports - gymnastics and hockey.

Ok I know I know, pick your stunned mullet selves off the floor and read on! Those of you that know the tomboy would find it oh so easy to see me covered in mud in the pouring rain, smacking that hockey ball right through the legs of the opposition defender! Oh and how much did I love that? There was something so cool about running on the field in the pouring rain, getting soaked to the skin, covered in mud and then home for a hot shower and something to eat! I wasn't half bad as a winger either, you may be suprised to learn. We were really fortunate that in both primary school and high school we had a brilliant rivalry between ourselves and another school. Different primary and high schools in similar areas but the rivalry was brutal. Come the top two play off it was always us against them and that was back in the days we cared not a jot about the self esteem of the losing team. There was never a suggestion we shouldn't share the scores with the young ones, lest they realise they are on the end of a pasting! I mean really, it isn't rocket science the ball goes flying past you to the other end and a goal is scored and it happens time and time again, you kinda get that you are being flogged! Luckily that didn't happen to us we had an awesome group of girls.

It is kind of funny looking back you know because for all our ferosity on the pitch, and the "die you b***h die" mentality on the field in the heat of battle, when that final whistle blew, it was like someone flicked a switch. Both teams of girls were all on the same team, flicking even more mud and muck on each other if that was even possible, having a great laugh and thanking each other for an awesome game irrespective of which of us won that round.

There was no such thing as fights on the field or worse yet parents fighting on the sidelines. As a parent of todays school sports players I now realise what bliss we lived in during those times. No-one was playing for sheep stations and it was all just a bit of good fun!

Soooo those of you that know me are really struggling to picture moi as the petite, delicately feminine model of a gymnast, right? Come on, don't try to pretend nice, you know you are thinking it, yes you are, go on just admit it!!!

I was but a wee thing as a child, a little short, skinny kid back then (oh puberty is a cruel cruel thing!) I started gymnastics at about age 8 and continued through til I was about 16. The latter years weren't quite so successful being 5' 7" and a little less than "rake like" in appearances didn't really do a lot for my future successes I can tell you.

However pretty, petite and delicate is part of the mix, but so too was power, speed, and strength, and I was good at that bit! It is funny how now we talk about developing upper body strength in girls and making sure we balance the exercises we do with them. Back then we did it all! Chin ups on the bars, sit ups, push ups, bouncing off of beat boards in handstands to build up shoulder strength and upper body strength.

The other thing we worked on of course was flexibility. Lots of painful contorsions of our bodies to see just how far we could push things without a zing/snap/tear happening. Now I think about I never really felt that sore the next day, oh the beauty of youth we took forgranted back then.

Towards the end of my gymnastics training I took up coaching the younger kids. I sooo loved it and they, strangely enough, loved me too! I did some coaching courses in my late teens and was quite into it for awhile. My hubby reckons I am a frustrated teacher at heart, maybe he is right, life seems to keep bringing me back to teaching in one form or another.

I gave up on coaching gymnastics as things became so competitive, we had talent squads and then we had programs that bussed you to school after your morning training before school every day, then bussed you back there for after school training and the same again on weekends. These were babies of maybe 9 or 10 years of age being pushed as if they would be the next world champions. Of all the kids I know of that went there maybe 1 in 1000 might have made national success, none of them international. We were making them choose this sport over all others, we were making them give up their lives to be this supreme athlete. Nadia Commenich was my total hero growing up. I had seen what giving up gymnastics did in her life, because she knew no other and I couldn't willingly participate in doing that to any other children's lives. They must be kids first, sporting participants second - so in my late teens I walked away from gymnastics.

In the times that I trained in these sports I loved them - it wasn't exercise, it was hard work at times but it was fun, it was challening - it was enjoyable.

In my early twenties I decided I should do something so I did the whole join the gym thing that was big at the time. Weights were good, there was a challenge there but after awhile it became a bit ho-hum, here we go again. Tried my hand at aerobics too - hmmm definitely not my thing. Perhaps my gymnastics training served me too well and I was too co-ordinated, either that or I had arrived at Unco-s-R-Us aerobics class. I had never seen so many people who didn't know their left from their right and if the exercise called for doing different things with different hands, oh good Lord, stand clear you could lose an eye! So I would do this class thinking, hmm feeling a bit hot now, feeling tired now, oh for pete's sake can you just do the damn thing right and stop stepping on my feet because you are going the WRONG DAMN WAY!! These were the years of my hate relationship with exercise. It was torture, I hated it and still I felt this intrinsic sense of guilt to make myself keep going to re-live the nightmare on a daily basis.

Fortunately pregnancy and childbirth gave me ample excuse not to have to be fit looking and that stomach flab, I could wear it proudly as the post baby bulge...oh of course it doesn't look great but look at this baby!

I tried my hand at variations on the theme well as much as you can with two young kids.

Then at thirty something I found myself accompanying one son to karate lessons. He didn't want to go on his own, and there was some "sign up two it's cheaper deal", so off we went together. The plan, I would do the first 3 months and bow out gracefully and he could keep going. I don't think he even made it to 3 months you know. Over eight years on, I am still going!

Karate is the closest match to gymnastics I have ever found. No I haven't lost the plot! We are talking traditional karate here, kata and bunkai (self defence applications) not the kinds of karate that entails breaking cement tiles with your forehead.

Kata requires balance, grace, and precision - all of which gymnastics requires. Yet there is also a need to demonstrate power, strength, and speed - again all required in gymnastics. No wonder it is such a perfect fit for me....well it is in the sense of my enjoyment of it, perhaps not so in my ability to execute it?????

I like to think of the karate we do as "the thinking person's sport". There is so much detail to be aware of, there is a history and a purpose to each series of moves and their meaning. You are sooo busy thinking about all that stuff, it isn't until you finish that you realise just how knackered you are feeling. Yep most definitely back in the LOVE phase of exercise, I miss it when I can't go, it is like a drug now really, going to training!

Contrary to some of the media stereotypes karate brings people from all walks of life to have a go, people that were it not for karate, it is highly unlikely I would have crossed paths with them at all.

Remembering all those damn compulsory routines - a different one for floor, bars, and beam, and then all the optional ones too......I'm sure that is why I find remembering kata moves and patterns a little easier than others.

Those early years of strength training and flexibility - oh thank you God - without that my kicks would never be head high! Nor would I be able to use that strength when I need it.

Oh and for the last couple of years of my karate training, this too had lead me back to teaching. Teaching in another sport and loving it just as much. There is something quite humbling about teaching, putting yourself out there, knowing at some point you will screw up and your students will know you have screwed up!! At which point you can only really laugh at yourself and get on with it. Teaching in general but perhaps more so in karate is most definitely a showing of humility, and of learning together alongside your students with every member of the dojo a teacher and every member a student.

KARATE - OH YEAH STILL LOVING IT!!!

IF IT WAS EASY ANYONE COULD DO IT!!!!!!

Mutual unconditional love

Ok part 2 - the four legged friend who tests the limits of unconditional love.

Did you ever wonder if personality traits and psycho behaviour were limited to just humans? We have living proof that fodder for the canine equivalent of Dr Freud is alive well, and one of them lives at our house.

Xena came into our lives as a supposedly 6-7 month old German Shepherd/Kelpie cross rescued from the Animal Welfare League. Yes she is named after Xena Warrior Princess because at the time of adoption she was on additional feeds due to her being severely underweight and she had many nicks and scrapes on her body, evidence that life hadn't been kind to her. We decided this was clearly a survivor in need of a "girl power" name and so Xena it became.

For those of you that have kids, you know how from the time they pop out they know how to screw with your heads? You know no-one tells them but instinctively they know how to push the buttons so you go from calm in control adult to psychotic out of control parent in under 10 seconds. I mean even as newborns they pretend to stop breathing just long enough for you to be mid 000 before they gurgle and turn over!

Well this is just how Xena got in to this house. One of our German Shepherds (Clyde) had passed away and Bonnie was lonely without him. She was about 8 years old and truly elegant lady. So we decided we would head off to the pound in search of a friend for company for Bonnie.

There in this cage stood a lovely lady 6-7 months old, walks well on a lead said the card on the door. So back inside we went for the lead to take this girl into the play yards at the pound to get to know her. Well, I tell you, it is here her mind games began. Oh how beautifully she walked on the lead next to C, as if she knew just how she was supposed to behave. In went the boys, oh still Madam Perfection - no jumping, no scratching, no chasing. Of course when you have another dog you have to have the two of them meet at the pound before you can take them home.

Well Bonnie wasn't over the moon about Xena (hmmm perhaps we should have listened) but she didn't mind her that much either. Xena on the other hand played the placid, submissive underdog like she should have been the lead in Annie the musical! So of course we decided we should take her but we had to wait for her to be desexed prior to picking her up. I swear the little cow knew, you know, she knew she was in baby, no need to act that perfect pet now!

So home she came that first night and we all fussed over her, then off to bed we went. Bonnie (& Clyde while he was alive) would never dream of touching food that wasn't for them. Having had them for 8 years we had kind of forgotten what was "normal dog behaviour". Oh joy! next morning, not only had she done assorted piles of business in the house...oh yeah number 2's as well as number 1's....she had helped herself to some lolly Christmas stockings that were waiting for some friends we had yet to catch up with yet. Holy Moly, this dog had eaten everything in 2 Christmas stockings except the "M & Ms" only because she couldn't get the packet open. So much for chocolate being deadly toxic for all dogs...oh no, no. no, no, no not for this mutt! She had 2 snickers bars, 2 small Cadbury chocolates, several Freddo Frogs and not so much as a runny bum! She was pretty damn lively that morning, doped to the eye balls on her nocturnal sugar fix. We on the otherhand were like "oh what have we done?"

C had 12 months of long service leave commencing about the time Xena came home. So Xena had the pleasure of his company all day for 12 months. It was the beginning of a beautiful relationship, well beautiful for one of them anyway!!! For her it was the beginning of her "C obsession". Smitten, obsessed you name it, she is his for life!

At times it takes me all my control not to laugh when she starts to behave like the attention seeking child, any attention being good attention. If he doesn't pat her when she comes up to him for attention, she waits til he is distracted and then using both paws encircles his feet. Well he may just pull away you know, so to prevent that, she must manage to gouge her claws into his feet, drawing blood should it be necessary to prevent his ultimate escape. The only way to end the bloodshed and severe pain of impaling by dog paw, is of course to pat her belly with his foot.

If she is unsure of his mood and she is not sure if she will get a happy reaction or a grumpy reaction, she approaches tail wagging at one end, lip curling back over the teeth at the other...talk about a screwed up mutt!

She gets on really well with Bella, hates every other dog...well perhaps that is a little unkind. She likes them from a distance, then when they get close she gets scared and then it is growls, teeth baring and hold onto the lead for dear live....so when we walk, we talk not to the other canines of the district.

As much as she loves C, she doesn't like men much, the only exception being my brother. People say he and I are a lot alike so maybe he is enough like me that she accepts him as part of the family. As for other males, when they get here it is a slow process. She is actually just scared of them but she has worked out if she growls and carries on and they get scared they back off and go away and she can rest without worrying about them, situation solved!! However she can't behave that way with all our male visitors. So usually we give her some space to get used to the idea they are in the house and she needs to get over it. So they sit there wondering if they are here for a meal or to in fact be the next meal! Over the course of the evening she decides that clearly she isn't going to get rid of them so she might as well go check them out. Usually before they leave she has decided they are actually quite nice, nice enough for me to stand on their chair and breathe my best doggy breath all over them and if they are really lucky, she might try to kiss them too.

I often say to her "only a "mother" could love you". She is the most loving, loyal dog with the most seriously annoying behaviour. If I go out to the washing line for 5-10 minutes, I don't need a welcome home reception befitting of 12 months away from home. I don't need to spend my time fending feet and other body parts away from my body - the karate block does help in this instance though! My favourite is all the experts that say "when your dog jumps up simply turn your back on them and they will stop, then turn around again"...helloooo come try that little number on Xena. When your clothes are stretched to tearing point, the layers of skin are peeling off like the skin of an onion, and any minute you expect to see blood seeping through the layers, at what point do I decide that ignoring her jumping up is not damn well working????

Add to that incidental psychosis at the time of getting ready for going for a walk, that means screaming around the house knocking stuff over, moving rugs and of course extra exuberant jumping up on the person carrying the lead. This dog gets more exercise from the carry on before we leave home than she actually gets on the damn walk!

Only our resident psycho works out how to push the "childproof gate" at the bottom of the stairs in order to sneak upstairs first thing in the morning when she hears the alarms or C talking to me. She sneaks up those stairs like a panther in the dark of night. How can a dog climb wooden stairs without a single tell tale sign, until you feel this body crash land onto the bed from a launch pad metres outside the door?

Still if my children were ever at threat or risk, I know with absolute certainty that Xena would put herself on the line to protect them. She is fiercely protective of what she considers to be her family.

Underneath that total psycho exterior is a very loving, very gentle nature, it just takes some time and patience to bring out the best in her.

I think she came to us for a reason, I fear if anyone else took her home she would have been returned too many times and would have been declared "not rehomeable" and she would have bought a needle and ticket to doggy heaven. I think it was only loonies like our household that would accept the idiosyncracies, see past them to the loving heart that she has.

That is why when it comes to Xena it has to be a case of mutual unconditional love for it to work!

The true meaning of unconditional love

Well that simply has to be a dog right?

Yeah yeah, I know lots of folk like cats, but really they are just slaves to a four legged native fauna killer that thinks of itself as their master.

Dogs on the other hand, all they want to do is please their master. Yep sure do love my four legged girls. So much so my kids made the comment in the past "anyone would think you love your dogs more than you do us"

Hmmm let's stack it up
They eat whatever I put in front of them
When I ask them to do something, they do, no answering back, no face pulling and not a single "whatever!" to be heard
No matter how crappy their day has been, they are always so excited and happy to see me

Hmmm you can see how this was a tough one to answer as the maternal matriach of the clan.

I have 2 four legged girls, today though will be about the newer of "the girls", Bella. Well we called her Bella (Italian for beautiful of course!) but she goes by many names; princess Bella, mummy's beautiful princess, princess or sometimes prancer.

And a prancer she is! I had all but forgotten of that cartoon of my youth where Pepe La Pew continues to seek "his amore" in the form of a totally terrorised feline, who no matter how hard she tries can not escape his love potion! When Bella plays at home and is chasing her ball or her other doggy play mate, she reverts to Pepe La Pew in an instant. You know what I mean though? That bounce, bounce, bounce on 4 legs that he used to do, especially when in pursuit of the "cat of his dreams", my Bella she prances just like that!

Oh and Princess, well she does think of herself and being quite special. Other dogs sleep on that bit of cement or pavers they find in the sunshine. Not Princess Bella, she is no mere dog! Oh no, the ground is no place for a princess - the really nice chairs of the outdoor setting on the otherhand, a majestic throne for a princess no less! Of course since she is supposed to be here to look after the house, if she has to see what might be going on down on the streets around us, she can always use the table to rest her chin on while she looks around!

One of my favourite times is knowing that my kids are about to come downstairs in the morning. No I can not see them or hear them from the kitchen. What I do hear is a slow "doof, doof, doof" sound, then it gets a little faster, then a little faster, until of course lying there just doing that is impossible. No!!!! Wagging my tail and hitting the floor is not enough, I'm about to burst with excitement, I simply have to jump to my feet and race to the bottom of the stairs to meet my 2 favourite household members. The two that will fawn all over me, maybe even crawl around on the floor and retrieve my most precious of possessions, the overchewed, split in the middle tennis ball, from its resting place under the couch. With a cute little tail wag, a whine and nose stuck under the chair, I can lure them right there with me in search of treasure.

On other occasions Bella resembles an articulated bus....no not because she has a butt the size of the back end of a bus, but because she folds in the middle just like that! When she is excited to see us, she wags her tail and bends in the middle regularly smacking herself in the head with her tail - not a problem, nothing is too much to show her family how much she loves them. And if that doesn't convince them she brings out the voice, the little noises that aren't quite barks but just come out in her attempt to greet them when they arrive home.

Or while I sit here typing this post about her, she has come into the study and curled up in a ball on the floor. Not seeing my attention, jumping up or causing a fuss, just coming in to be with me here in the study.......

yep that is most assuredly unconditional love ....oh and for my other four legged girl the unconditional love has to work both ways....different is one word that comes to mind to describe her - next blog post will be the story of Xena...yeah named after Xena Warrior Princess - sad but true!

What is with the pink?

Ok so those that know me would be just a tad suprised to find me on a PINK blog page! It is not like I don't have my fair share of serious curves, some more likened to that found on rather large sea creatures currently under attack from the Japanese. I guess it just that I'm not your girlie girl.

Why is it that we have this ideal or girlie girl, or not girlie girl? If you are a girlie girl, you must be an airhead whose biggest decision in life is what colour to have your foils, or what little stick on delight to put on your acrylic nails this week. If you are not a girlie girl, then you are somehow a tomboy, a non-deserving member of the female community. " A little rough around the edges" those dear old ladies would say with that smiling under protest grimace pasted on to their faces, "hmm is she married then?" would be the next question.

How liberating it is not to be the girlie girl! People have no clue about what makes you tick and, more often than not, you are a complete mystery to them.

"What you don't wear make up during the day?"
"no thanks but I can't be knacked putting it on, let alone taking it all off again at the end of the day"

You mean you can really be ready to go out in less than half an hour?
"How long does it take to throw on a pair of jeans, a wincheater and madly run a brush through the hair while running out the door?"

And if you mention that karate is your sport of choice - well it is all over! Why would a "more mature woman" (aka old bag mother of 2) want to do karate? I tell you, they don't know what they are missing. Where else can we girls, get hot and sweaty, shout and yell and people don't even bat an eye lid, let alone wonder if perhaps we are having some kind of pre-menopausal melt down?

So here's to all those girls that are really happy in their own skin with who they are, with no need to fit some consumer driven stereotype designed by some high flying CEO on a quest for their next quintillion! What an awesome place to be, where you are just you, and people can either like you or bugger off and talk to someone who cares.

So a pertinent or a pointless meandering - you decide